2022 is infamous for break-ups specially in showbusiness. Amidst reasons such as, irreconcilable differences, third-parties, religious and political beliefs, couples normally argue and end their relationships because of finances.
That is why couples can take on several and pocket friendly approaches when it comes to their finances.
The simplest would be the 50-50 split or splitting the bill by taking into account any differences in wealth.
But how do you go about a demand from your partner that you pay more because you earn more, and wouldn’t take no for an answer?
One woman is in a difficult position as her soon-to-be-husband expects her to pay for things for his and his friends after hearing that she got a pay raise.
Her fiancé invited her out for dinner nd thereafter ambush her with the bill no matter how hard she tried telling him that she will not cover it.
The woman ended up sneaking out of the restaurant as her fiancé would not take no for an answer.
The disastrous evening dinner ended up in the “Am I the A******e”, an online forum. The woman claimed that the dinner was one of several similar incidents.
She wrote: “I, 33 female ,have been engaged to my fiancé, 37 male , for 5 months. We don’t share finance because that’s what he wants. I got a raise on my salary. now I earn 30% more than he does and I noticed that he’s been using this to ask me to pay for him and his friends. Whenever I say ‘no’ or ‘why should I pay for this?’ he’d respond with ‘the 30% that’s why’. He acts as if the 30% is unfair or that I’m not deserving of it.”
“Several times he has tricked me to pay for his and his friend’s meals by asking me publicly. Let me say that I’m too nice to say ‘no’, I hate confrontation especially when we’re at a public place like a restaurant so I just grin and pay.”
“Last Tuesday, he asked me to join him and his buddies for dinner. I told him from the start I wasn’t paying for their food and he shouldn’t expect me to. He said he ‘got this’ and ‘no worries’.”
“We got to the restaurant. Met his friends, ordered food. And in the middle of the meal he leaned in and whispered that I would be paying for everything he and his friends ordered.”
“I got so mad I whispered back ‘noooo’ but he probably relied on me not causing a scene in public and infront of his friends. he said ‘you have enough money you could pay for everyone’s food, 30% remember?'”
She continued: “I was fuming inside. instead of reacting negatively and losing my temper. I waited til the bills arrived (they were already split from the start when we first ordered) I paid for mine then I excused myself to the restroom. I then sneaked out from there, got into my car and went home.”
“I started getting phone calls from my fiancé then texts asking where I was. I texted back saying I didn’t appreciate how he put me in this situation and basically tricking me into paying for his and his friends food. I told him I went home then stopped replying.”
“An hour later he came and started yelling at me calling me selfish, irrational, cheapskate and childish for sneaking out like that and leaving him stuck with a bill he could not pay (He had to call his brother for help). We had a loud argument then he walked out.”
“His friends didn’t speak to me on this but he told me they’re disappointed in my behavior and are telling him to take time and ‘reflect’ on the type of woman he’s gonna be married to.”
The woman then asked fellow users if her fiancé had acted fairly, adding that he later admitted to not telling her about his expectation on purpose because he knew she would refuse, but he thought it was acceptable as the restaurant “wasn’t expensive”.
And boy, people were quick to rush to the woman’s defense, she was told to reconsider her relationship.
“I feel like you’re the one that needs to do the reflecting on the type of man you’ll be married to…”, said one comment.
Agreed another: “He needs to be an ex. Instead of being happy for your achievements he’s bitter and jealous.”
Someone else also added: “Why are you marrying someone who insists that his money is his money, but your money is also his money?”
Do you think the woman has a point? or is it right to give her fiancé the benefit of the doubt?
He must be a demonRAT.
Dump this loser because if you marry him it will not last and no doubt in my mind he will definitely want alimony!
If you enter into a relationship with splitting everything then you don’t change up when one or the other makes gains. However if you are getting married once the I Do’s are said everything is joint. My hubs and I know I am the saver and he is the spender. When I tell him funds are low we both keep spending to as little as possible. Once all the bills are paid I skim a little to put away. I know there will always be something he wants or we need. My son and his wife they keep everything split he pays his she pays hers. If they go out somewhere who ever asks the other out gets the check. They started out with everything going into one bank account that didn’t work for them. We have two accounts but one he don’t touch because that is where I put the savings. So ladies and gents communicate from the start and if you realize at a later point things are not working from the way you started sit down and come up with a resolution before the I do’s.
Great advice.
No way, that man would be out of my life like yesterday’s garage, I was married too a man just like that , his money was his money my money was ours .I live with that for 31 years. Finally woke up and divorced the cheap scape. and I didn’t take one thing that I didn’t pay for . like her I didn’t like arguing so I put up with it . biggest mistake I ever made.get out while the getting is good lady.
What an absolute jerk! She definitely needs to dump him and go on her merry way. She is obviously intelligent and is capable of taking care of herself.
Really consider how this relationship will work over time. As it will stay the same or get worse. He is not being fair to you, your relationship and your long term plans as a couple.
Just want to point out, if the roles were reversed everyone would be telling the man to stop whining and pay for his woman’s food.
Maybe not the friends too though. Pretty sure they’d say to leave they crazy ass.